Preamble
Gwen Stefani, Billie Eilish and Harmony Nice(YouTuber) are the first female’s that spring to mind when I think of someone with a distinctive style. To have a ‘style’ is to have a sense of self or even an understanding of who you are. Yet letting clothes define us seems both arbitrary and damaging.
My mother always said, “dress shabbily and you notice the dress, dress elegantly and you notice the women.” For my mother, this doesn’t come from a place of expectation of ‘elegance’ from a woman. She believes they should wear what they want, however, there is an argument within her statement about how you carry yourself.
Today I would like to break down ten photos of myself. Basically where I was feeling myself or I wasn’t.
Times I don’t feel myself
There is no way for me to explain why, but I dislike how I’ve dressed in these photos despite whether I look ‘good’ or not. Now don’t worry I’m not thinking I’m ugly, I still think I look pretty. I just don’t feel, like myself. I think some of them are fashion disasters, which is also fun to name and shame! I’ll only ever do that for myself because I’m not into judging other people’s fashion choices. You do you boo.
This is a very nice photo. The top is super nice it was a ‘hand-me-over’ from a friend. My makeup is done well. This is not me though. I feel like this is fake. The smile isn’t real and the person behind this photo is lying. It’s too girly for me. I think being girly is totally fine, but it doesn’t feel right on me.
Again I don’t look ‘bad’ here. However, this was a time when I thought because I enjoy wearing boys clothes (all these items are from the male sections of shops), that I wasn’t ‘allowed‘ wear makeup. If I wore male clothes because they were more comfortable for me, then surely I couldn’t wear makeup. Where would that fit in? Now I wear as much makeup with my ‘male’ clothes as I like.
Now I’m not sure what I was going for here, but I hate it. The hair pulled back from my face is really distracting. I love my natural hair so why not just let it fall? Also maybe I need a fringe. Then the top under the other top. So conservative which I’m not. I don’t mind showing skin, so this feels weird to me.
I could probably find a photo of me in this dress from when I was 20 where I looked amazing. This is not that photo. The hair length is a disaster. I love the Miley Cyrus Converse but with that dress? Nope. I’m trying too hard to be ‘sexy’ here and again, not me. I don’t mind showing skin, but I’m not comfortable trying to be ‘sexy.’
This is an old one, but the only thing I like about this photo is my glasses. That’s it. Hate my hair, hate the dress, hate the pose and the makeup is boring. Also, I don’t even look that happy.
Times I really feel myself
So there are times you take a photo and you just feel bomb. You stan yourself (am I still young enough to use that term?). These are those photos, and you’ll notice that with the introduction of more exciting lipsticks from JSC, I started getting really comfortable with myself.
This was the hair that Le’Boo liked the most. He loves the colour red so you can understand why. I love everything about this outfit. The cute dress, the blue t-shirt, the hat. My makeup is simple but flattering and this is a genuine smile. (I was on my way to Whiskey Live so that may have contributed to the smile).
Some of you might recognise this photo from my Youtube channel before I overhauled the intro sequence. Again love the simple band shirt (and yes I love the Eagles before you @ me). I’m into the cute hair buns, the Pikachu necklace and the purple lippy. A win in my book, even with the toilet in the background.
So I’m a huge fan of black lipstick and I’ve only had the confidence to wear it in the last few years. As a teenager, I would have loved to wear black lippy, but grew up in an area where alternative modes of dress were frowned upon. By that I mean all the girls dressed the same (and still do) and all the boys dressed the same (and still do). Although my friends were not judgemental I couldn’t take the harsh unsolicited comments from peers in school or on the street. Although I did dress the way I wanted to an extent I was careful to not go ‘too far.’
These photos were taken 2 days apart and it was when I got my first Jeffree Star liquid lipsticks ‘Blow Pony’ and ‘Huntington Beach’. I was so happy that I was ‘bold’ enough to wear them. I paired them with my tattoos and dark hair. I was so excited to have them, and I still love both these colours to this day. I’m a fan of bold colours guys, have you noticed?!
Finally, this photo was taken less than 1 week ago. I’ve come to realise that many types of expressions are my ‘style.’ I love being comfortable and cool. Yet I am happy in dresses too and soft makeup looks. I don’t mind dressing like a boy and I certainly welcome the pockets. If you don’t feel like you have a ‘style’ and this is concerning for you. Fear not. Just do what I now do. Do you like an item of clothing? Are you wearing it for you and nobody else? Then that’s your style. You dress whatever way you want (without getting arrested for public nudity of course), and let no one tell you that’s not YOUR ‘style.’
Hope you’re all well in these troubling times Moonlings. I’ve missed you all. Talk soon. Jaycee. xxx
Thinking Moon 
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